March 24, 2010 - Unofficial "Mad as a Hatter" Day

Ever have one of those days? Mine started yesterday with a neighbor - having just sold his house but stopping by to remove some more junk he collected from the garage - whipped it out and took a whizz behind said garage, in direct line of sight from my bedroom window. How de-lightful! But onward and upward I grabbed my bags with my MS for further editing, my research for the revisions and my guide to writing the perfect synopsis and headed to work. Where nothing went right and I was stuck at my desk all day, including through lunch.

Ah, well, there's always the evening hours, right?

Except I got home and noticed my one dog (Scout, the elder of my two remaining rescued ex-racing greyhounds) was bleeding from her mouth. No doubt a dig from chewing on a Milk-bone or a stick, right? Well, after 45 minutes during which time the bleeding grew steadily worse, I made the decision to take her to the emergency vet. Clutching my credit card I arrived at 8:15. By then she was bleeding fairly hard and she and I were covered in it. Following the examination they sedated her (ka-ching), intubated her (ka-ching), sutured her (ka-ching), gave her fluids (ka-ching) and medications - 3 (ka-ching, ching, ching). I just sat there with the bloody clothes getting tacky, though I was distracted by running down the block to the Dunkin' Donuts, which had the only bathroom in the area. And I called a friend to kill some time before Scout roused after 11 PM.

In the end I coughed up $1,200 to pay for these various treatments and I drug poor old Scout on her wobbly legs back home where I then sat up watching the Law & Order SVU marathon until 1:30. Her cries, whimpers and wheezing had eased enough by then that I felt OK going to bed. But I woke up twice between then and 6:30 to check on her, so all in all about a meagre 4 hours sleep.

And then guess what?

I got to jump up and come back to work!

Where another day of hectic insanity left me without a lunch hour at all (and potty breaks were few and far between, too), and here I am, with quitting time having come, and gone, and I'm still at my post.

Posting.

Edits? Revisions?

Pshaw.

Oh, well, there's always tomorrow.

Didn't someone once say that?

March 18, 2010

Long time between posts for me and only now, with the Spring looming and some freakin' sun and warmth for a change (after 3 massive snowstorms and a nor'easter in March for crying out loud, not to mention ice storms, frigid temps, dark, gray, cold nastiness that led to post-apocalytpic nightmares and weird dreams) am I coming out of my mental and emotional hibernation.

I'm still plugging away on my edits and revisions to "Between a Rock & a Bad Place". I feel like the Scarecrow after the fight with the flying monkeys - bits and pieces of me all over the place - but I'm getting back together and am happy to report that I'm finding some good new "gems" of writing to move the book along.

I've found some super publishers to submit to (who take unagented queries) and even though I missed the first Liberty States conference (because of the nor'easter) my request for an appointment with the Grand Central Publishing editor who canceled anyway garnered me a letter of intro and her agreement to accept a full MS from those folks who requested appointments. So I can submit to her as soon as I've polished this sucker up!

I'm discovering lots of great new urban fantasy authors in my "research" at Barnes & Noble and on-line while hunting for the different publishers and imprints who do what my book is. Certainly better than studying for my organic chemistry final in college!

I'm holding out hope for an incredibly beautiful weekend so I can enjoy some time outside. Though I do have to do yard work (BIG TIME!) the physical labor is actually relaxing and uses up all that nudgy energy. And after a few chores I can grab my MS and sit in my favorite chair, soak up the rays and the Vitamin D and improve my glum mood and EDIT!

Then in just a few weeks I'm on vacation! By which time I hope to have some submissions/queries out and be ready to move on to the next project, which is my erotic romance suspense novel I'm going to do during the Liberty States "Mayke It Happen" May book in a month challenge.

February 15, 2010 - President's Day

Gotta love 3 day weekends, especially coming off the last two weeks of MY life. No wait, make that the last 6 weeks.

First was the last gasp of my Presidency for the Gothic Romance Writers, getting the Board filled in and passing on membership information and cleaning up the Yahoo site. Then came the LAST gasp of my Vice Presidencey's Love & Laughter contest work for the RWA/NYC chapter. Single-handed is so not the way to do the contest, but there I was, every day returning the 27 (record number) of entries to contestants with their judging and commentary sheets. No artist I, then the creation of the Winner's Certificate for her entry - which, if I do say so myself was simply stunning and NOT riddled with hearts and flowers, which is not my thing at all. Then I had to attend the last meeting to hand it out, say goodbyes (although no one seemed interested in saying goodbye, so I just went drinking with Maria and Lis). That weekend would have wound up so much better EXCEPT my oil burner went on the fritz on Sunday evening. Much sturm und drung and having to use a personal day on Monday after NO sleep Sunday night, the oil burner was repaired and that week ended up being just super busy at work. Did I write? Edit? No.

Then came the next weekend. Monday, not bad. The usual overwhelming workload. A super snow storm loomed on the horizon, giving me angst about getting to work on Wednesday. THEN on Tuesday I left my backpack on the train. It would not have been much of a loss, though I love the backpack, but it had all my BILLS in it (personal identity? ID theft?). I leapt off the bus to run back to Penn Station to get it - and got squished between the bus, which just took off, and a construction barricade. A protuberance on the bus slammed into my shoulder and I look like The Rock used it for a heavy bag. Green and yellow and blue from shoulder to elbow and hurts like the Dickens. I raced around like a madwoman trying to locate the bag to no avail. Frantic, I had to go home and then came the snow.

Bam. 17 inches. I shoveled like a robot all day long, 8 episodes from 9 AM to 8 PM. And then 6 inches fell after that. So, I lost a PTO day and still had to get up early and slog through the piled up white stuff. Writing? Editing? Nah.

Thursday arrives and I crawl to work. NYC has no discernable snow, though LI is a white freakin' wonderland. I checked at the Lost & Found in the AM - futiley as it turned out - but just when I thought I was on the brink of the "last straw" scenario, they called and said they'd found my bag.

YAY!

Going home after picking it up and finding all intact, did I write? Nope. Too weak with relief and exhaustion after the adrenalin and besides my shoulder hurt like a Mother.

Friday, I got through the day weak with relief and it was a hugely busy day so getting on the train at end of day was like being freed from a kidnapper.

BUT - I wrote. I read. I edited. I brainstormed.

Saturday - nothing. Exhausted, napped, cooked (great beef stew, BTW) and tried to recuperate.

Sunday - food shopping, bought a Nook and several titles (very cool, by the way and I actually got it up and running with no help from the dimwitted Nook "expert" at B&N). Nice long bath with epsom salts and then I slept from 9:30 to 9:20 AM this morning. Writing? Editing? Revising? Guess again.

So there you have it. It's President's Day and I have the "gotta go back to work Sunday blahs" only a day later. Another snow storm is on the way (lesser amounts - 2-5 we hope, we hope, but they say sleet and rain, which makes the snow heavier and my trees/bushes are already screaming for mercy.).

I've got a curry chicken dish to make for dinner. I have 1 load of laundry in in the vain hope that the 40 degree and sunny (for now) day will dry at least a few loads. The rest will have to hang around the living room/bathroom to dry, because I am OUT of work clothes.

BUT - I will be reading and editing and revising today. For sure. I've made it through 6 weeks of hideousness. The holidays took it out of me and my exultation that, on Jan. 1, I'd be free, was a vain hope. But now I am. The contest is over and everything's handled. The RWA chapter responsibilities are over and done. My Saturdays are free. Work is getting handled and I'm getting used to the stress of working for some of the busiest, and most exacting people in the office.

I've caught up on my sleep and while my housecleaning is lagging behind (Like it's still at the starting line) I'm getting there. And I've got vacation scheduled so I have something to look forward to (including Spring, btw).

So, today I'll be pulling out my MS and gathering the collections of printouts and all those revisions and I'll be prepared to have a fine-tuned first three chapters this week. Plus a serious outline of where I need to improve my scenes, my worldbuilding, my characterizations and then comes the big day:

March 13 - when I go to the Liberty States Conference and pitch my book! I don't know who I got for my editorial and agent choices - hopefully all of them! If not I'll get at least one. And then when I come back - if there has not been a request, then I'll begin my query process to the list of publishers I've already made, none of whom are attending Liberty.

Spring is on the way! My book is in great shape though it does need refining. I'm going to be making my very first submission before long and I've overcome a few weeks of hell.

Bloody but unbowed - definitely battered and bruised - but I made it through.

What did you say?

Oh, right.

So sit down and start writing fool!

February 7, 2010.

The Northeast missed being whalloped by the storm that dumped 2 - 3 feet of snow south from southern NJ through the mid-Atlantic. There's another predicted for Wednesday, though, so I can only hope we'll be that lucky again, especially since the LIRR has commented that they will cease all operations if there's more than 10 inches of snow - to avoid having another incident with a stuck train (but stranding millions of passengers in NYC would be OK? Sheesh. Talk about excessive ...).

Despite the bountiful sun today it's still pretty darn cold and after attending my last NYC RWA chapter meeting yesterday, I've got just today to get all my errands and chores done. BUT I feel a sense of freedom, having delivered the certificate to the Love & Laughter contest winner, which ends my 2009 VP responsibilities, and is the last of all my RWA chapter responsibilities (that have overwhelmed me for the past 3 years).

So today is the first day on which I feel that I can focus, solely, on my own work. Having gotten my first novel completed on December 30, 2009, I am now heading into revisions and re-writes. Once all the running around (food shopping, picking up Mom's meds, and repairing the shower - I swear, I wish they had Rent-A-Guy so I could just pay for one to come over and do things like that. I don't need a plumber - ka-CHING - just a pair of capable hands and that Y chromosome.)

For now - looking forward to focusing on me, me, ME. And getting my urban fantasy baby all dolled up to send out.

Jan. 18, 2010

While I know many people think of this day as simply an extra day off, providing a long weekend, I always have a sense of the somber history of the day. When I was a little girl I recall the assassination and the call my mother got from a college friend telling her of Martin Luther King's death. I remember her sitting down and crying.

The sun is out here on LI and it's milder than it should be for January, but I'm enjoying the restive nature that allows me time to just sit and think (when, of course, I should be writing, cleaning, shopping, or doing laundry).

Contemplation, recognition of the world around me - especially right now when the tragedy in Haiti is still occupying center stage around the world. The opportunity for quiet time to just think and remember my place in the scheme of this world is very humbling. I had a couple of upsets during the holiday season that further reminded me I'm not all that and a bag of chips. So get over myself.

Thinking about the heroic character archtype. No hero is perfect. All heroes are flawed. They wouldn't be human if they were perfect. (Hey, even the Gods aren't perfect!) That MLK had his human frailties does not negate the contribution and the sacrifices he made for a greater good.

And I am saddened only that more people don't take the opportunity to remind themselves that there are bigger things out there in the world, more monumental events occuring, than just them and the incidents in their own lives.

Always remember and please never forget - it's not always about "me".

A hard lesson to be learning and for most of us, we need a remedial course!

Today is the day I always try to remind myself to be a better person, a stronger person, and a less selfish person. Sadly, I need the reminding.

January 1, 2010

It's here. The new year, the new decade. And I'm very excited about this year. Last year (and the year before) I had taken on way too many non-writing responsibilities for RWA chapters. This year they have all concluded and I am FREE FREE FREE to write.

I ended 2009 on a high note, however, despite the setbacks, frustration, procrastination, anxiety and myriad responsibilities that kept me from my writing. My Mother's challenge to me - her insistence that what she wanted for Christmas was a completed novel - caused me no end of angst from the minute she made the request (in October) until December 1. I tried 2 different novels (one based on her suggestion that I write "what I know" and write a romance set in an enterainment law firm, but toiling away all week in same made that a far less appealing concept.) I couldn't come up with anything that tempted me or inspired me and dropped that idea. I had a 2nd idea and wrote about 50 pages of it (based on a NYC, gossip type plot). But nope, didn't grab me. Then on December 1 I decided I had to write what I really was enthused about. I returned to an older idea - an urban fantasy with lots of adventure and humor - that I'd originally entitled Dead Man Talking. I wrote 1 first scene, and then a later scene that subsequently won third place in an RWA contest. But never went further. But I've thought about it in the 2 years since I started and that was the novel I decided, ultimately, to write.

Between 12/2 and 12/24 I wrote 200 pages, and added them to the other 20 pages already written. I gave Mother 1/2 of the newly titled BLACK MAGIC WOMAN on Christmas Eve. And them from 12/26 - 12/30 (that's right, FOUR FREAKING DAYS) I wrote another 128 pages. The total page count: 348. Total word count: 75,000.

She got the second half last evening.

My first, first draft, done, completed, finished. There's a lot of editing to be done, certainly, but I've already begun the editing process. And have spotted some great ways to add to what I already think is a great, fun, rollicking novel. Lots to do on it, but this milestone is HUGE.

And it means I can check off at least one of my 2009 goals: Finish a book. And it means I can start 2010 with a sense of accomplishment and success that will fuel me as I move forward in a new decade.

Color me totally psyched!

Nov. 28, 2009 - Harrumph.

I am sure I'm not the only one who has one of those spoilers in their life. The kind of person who seems on the outside to be a real cheerleader and supporter, but in fact is the kind of person who throws a moneky wrench into the works - effectively screwing up my plans. I do. I won't name names, but it's really upsetting me. Claiming I "willfully misunderstood" a request/plea so that my efforts are now doomed to failure. In fact I did not misunderstand. The request was quite clear and I was working hard toward the requested goal. Now suddenly that goal is moot and I'm "failing" because I should have known, but didn't, what the REAL request was.

I'm tired. A bad night's sleep (horrid winds and a couple of tree branches that I ended up getting up at 6:30 AM to drag my pruner around and chop them off. Garbage had to be hauled out and the interminable Thanksgiving dishes are still being washed (though, in all honestly, Thursday's dishes were done, but with my brother here we are going through those pots and pans at record speed). Food shopping, feeding animals and now the sun has set and what was a beautiful day was spoiled by someone who can't bear to see me succeed at anything.

Sometimes I just wonder when I'm going to get some "me" time and be left alone - without the constant editorializing about what I'm doing wrong.

Sigh.